Sample from Chapter 10: “Babysitting for Pat Benatar”

...The girl who took my call told me that Danny D wanted to talk to me about doing a special assignment. She told me to hold on while she transferred me to his office line. When he got on the phone, he said, “You like doing special assignments, don’t you?”

I told him I did, wondering what he had in mind.

He continued: “Pat Benatar is playing the Park West. Her daughter is with her, and she needs some personal security the night of the show. Can you do it?” I said that I could, and he gave me instructions on the where and when of the gig.

I don’t remember the name of the hotel where Ms. Benatar was staying, but I do remember that I was told to be there at 6:00 P.M., and to ask for a certain member of her staff when I got there. I was to stay with her and her family for the evening until I was told my services were no longer needed. The next day, I would call the office and let them know how many hours I had worked. Pretty simple. As I said, I was not a huge Pat Benatar fan, but hanging out with celebs or mingling with their associates is a big turn-on for me, so I headed downtown early to get a feel for the hotel and see if anyone was around.

I was also instructed to wear a suit for the assignment. I don’t even own a suit, so I put together a shirt and tie with dress pants for the gig. I think this was Danny’s idea, as when I got there, no one from her staff cared what I looked like. Just as long as I got there and was at their disposal.

All dolled up, I drove to the downtown Chicago area, located a place to park my car and secured a receipt from the parking garage. Danny paid for parking on gigs like these, which was great; all you had to do was turn in your receipts. After parking my car, I headed for the hotel, which was a block away. I wanted to see what it looked like and make sure that I was there early enough. I always allowed plenty of time when it came to getting to gigs. I have always been like that on all of my jobs.

It was about 4:00 when I got there, but I wasn’t supposed to be there until 6:00. I figured that once I knew where I was going, I could kill some time and grab a sandwich before heading to the hotel, then eat it and still arrive a little early.

As I rounded a corner of the building, I got a surprise that stopped me in my tracks. There was Pat Benatar coming out of the building, with a staff member by her side, headed in my direction! I freaked a little, and for some reason that I will never be able to properly explain, I didn’t want her to see me. I just spontaneously decided that I didn’t want her or her staff knowing that I was down there way too early. So before they got close to me, I blended in with a few other downtown pedestrians and hid as they passed by me. She never even saw me. Whew!

Maybe my subconscious mind gave me the bizarre idea that if they knew I was early, they might think I was more of a fan than a professional bodyguard. In most cases, they would have been right, but even though I used to get off on assignments like these, that wasn’t the reason I had come to the downtown area early that day. Maybe I didn’t want to frighten her the way I had spooked Ronnie Wood. To this day, I can’t explain it. Whatever the reason, I guess it’s kind of ironic that I was getting paid to work in the company of a celebrity, yet there I was, hiding from the very star I was scheduled to meet...

Sample from Chapter 6: “Heroes”

...Entering the dressing room, the first thing I noticed was a long table on one side loaded down with what looked like every kind of food known to mankind. Things like bowls of shrimp cocktail, crab legs, prime rib and various other items as well as an assortment of booze and soft drinks. The promoter pulled out all the stops to make Richards (and whomever he was bringing with him to the show that night) feel like royalty. There were three oversized couches, a laptop computer and various other luxuries scattered around the well-sized dressing room. Ponytail told me, “Just hang out here and wait ’til Keith arrives with Patti and their security guy. He’ll tell you what you need to do from then on.” He then exited the room.

When he left, I bolted around the dressing room like a big dog that had been freed from his leash. This was fucking awesome. I was soon going to meet the co-author of some of my most favorite tunes growing up, such as “Brown Sugar,” “Satisfaction” and “It’s Only Rock and Roll,” but this was not the only thing that was on my mind.